Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Happy Turkey Day To You All!!

I just wanted to say "Happy Thanksgiving" to all of you who read this blog. I didn't know that I would get so many different visitors to it over the past few months, but I look forward to updating you all when I can about Taylor and everything going on with her and the family.

This Thanksgiving, I am thankful for so much more than I was last time this year. A year ago, I was still suffering from a very painful loss and I put on a "front" around everyone. Everywhere I went, I had a smile on my face, but I was missing something terribly on the inside and didn't show or tell anyone. Christmas was even worse, but in February 2008, I got some news that made me feel so much better about things and gave me a new outlook on life. Later on, I got some news that made me even more happier, I was carrying a girl. For those of you who I shared some very personal information about my life with, you know how happy this news made me.

The pregnancy was by far the most difficult one I had ever had from the very beginning, I often wondered why I even continued on with the pregnancy when I had an opportunity and was told that maybe it wasn't the right thing to do at the time. I know this is difficult to read/hear...but if you were around me at the time, you would know I was going through so much at that time, that for others to bring a life into this world would not have been the right thing to do and others may have terminated it. To be honest and I hate to say this, i was all of about 24 hours away from ending the pregnancy. But I had to check my emotions at the door and I also got a series of text messages that gave me a new outlook on the entire situation.

Throughout this pregnancy, I have dealt with the following:

* Acid Reflux (So severe that even water activated it)
* Migraines
* Back Aches
* Digestion Issues (Won't say which one, but there were some deep issues)
* Pre-Term Labor
* Premature Rupture Of Membranes
* Intra-Uterine Growth Retardation (For the life of me I am still wondering why my doctor did not diagnose this and why he still has not said anything about it)
* Severe Cervical Dysplasia (CIN II)
* Depression
* Pregnancy Induced Hyper-Tension

And the birth did not make it any better, as I was induced for so long and did not move beyond 1cm for so long. Then add in a very un-professional staff headed by a resident physician that seemed not to give a damn and told me what I was felling and how far I had progressed (or had not) even though I know my body very well and told her otherwise and some nurses who probably graduated from nursing school before I was born. Imagine being in agony for hours and hours on end and not getting relief until that 3rd shift came on and it was made up of nurses who seemed to pay more attention to me and what I was telling them.

Around 12 am on 10/23, I had enough of not being listened to and was starting to reach that point where some heads were going to roll and I was actually thinking of getting up and getting out and going to another hospital. I told that 3rd shift of nurses to get that resident in the room and have her check me. She tried to tell me that she checked me at 11pm and I was only 1cm and I couldn't have possibly moved any further than that, despite the fact I had several children prior to this and a very weak cervix. I won't repeat what I said to that resident, but I gave her a look and told her when she checked me and that she had better do it again. Even the nursing staff told her that I was a multi-para (I think that is the term for women who have had more than 1 child) and based on my history, I should be checked. So I was checked and guess what?? Was 6cm dilated!! Big shocker. They then set up the delivery room, because at 11pm, I was only 1cm.

Even the pushing phase was difficult, I was held up by several people (one on each side and one behind me) and I pushed for what seemed an eternity, but guess what?? Taylor was doing the following:

* She was in a face up (Posterior) presentation
* She was still in her bag of water

Okay, what else could have gone wrong with this pregnancy and birth? I pushed for around 25-30 minutes, by far the longest I have ever pushed in my life. And pushing with the contractions didn't help, as she was not moving at all and I said this several times and they told me that she was coming down. After my bag was ruptured, about 3 or 4 pushes after that she was born. But guess what? She was not crying, I was looking at her (Taylor) and she was looking at the attending physician and blinking her eyes, but was not crying. She didn't start crying until they took her to the warmer and suctioned her out. Her apgars were 6/8 and she was very small.

I am so very thankful this year that despite everything I went through with this pregnancy, that she is alive and kicking to this day and is such a DIVA!!! She acts the same exact way she came into this world...full of drama and having to be the center of attention. And she is very healthy as well, so much could have been wrong with her, but she is surprising everyone by how well she is growing.

While at her 2 week visit, we ran into one of the medical students who was present at the birth (she was on my right side during the birth). This medical student was nothing short of amazing and I hope she goes into OB/GYN, because she would make an excellent OB/GYN and I would be glad to have her as my doc if she were located where I was. But she encouraged me during the birth when I was so ready to quit and just beg for a c-section, she was there when drama followed the birth while I was being repaired...she was on our side and suggested that I be given pain medication along with the others. This medical student saw us and was excited and while we were waiting for the doc to come into the room, she came in and played with Taylor and was amazed at how alert Taylor was, all Taylor did in the hospital was sleep, but she waited until she came home to start being up at insane hours of the day and night.

But that is the thing I am most thankful for. I am thankful that I have all my kids here and they are happy and healthy.

I hope you all have a very happy and FILLING Thanksgiving Day and don't forget to save me a plate, as my diet does not start for a few more weeks!! :-) Be Blessed!!!